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Writer's pictureWilliam R. Kimball

What Does it Really Mean to "Come Out of Her"?


Bluntly speaking, it means you are going to go through a spiritual divorce. But divorce is really the second step. The first step is examining the motives of your heart. It means that you search your heart and motives and make sure you shut the door behind you with a clean heart and clean hands. You make sure you are responding to His voice and not the rebellious voices in your head. It means your leaving, not becomes it offers an exciting opportunity to jump on the next spiritual bandwagon. Most of all, it doesn't mean that you are running from something but to something - namely Him.


It means that you have reached the absolute conviction that God has called you to leave and you can do so without stings attachment, second-guessing or wrong motives. It means that your decision is not shrouded in confusion, second-guessing and guilt. “Coming Out” you leave with everything - body and mind, heart and soul. It means you leave empty-handed.

It means that you search your heart and motives and make sure you shut the door behind you with a clean heart and clean motives. You make sure you are responding to His voice and not the deceptive voices in your head. It means your leaving, not becomes it offers an exciting opportunity to jump on the latest spiritual bandwagon. It means you leave empty-handed.

It means you have reached a point where you can make a clean break with a clean heart and right motives. It means that you are fully convinced before God that you ae doing the right thing and your decision is not the by-product of peer pressure, guilt trips or the expectation of others. You are doing it not because others have talked you into it but God has talked you into it.


It means that you are ready to step out in faith and trust Him to lead your steps. It means you are willing to accept a major paradigm change in your life. It means you have made the commitment to leave behind any emotional attachments, affection or involvements that would hold you back and sow doubt. It means that you are ready to forsake the well-worn rythimes of the church life you once embraced. It means you stop supporting it, giving to it, participating in it, fearing it or being intimidated by it.

It often means that you are ready to stand alone. It will often mean that no matter how hard you try to make a clean bread you will face the inevitable opposition, rejection and condemnation that will come – often from those who were your closest relationships. It means you will lose former friends – not because you have forsaken them but because they will forsake you. It means that you are prepared to become a spiritual pariah to many of your fellow churchgoers. It means accepting the stigma of being censored, marginalized and black-listed because of the stand you are making.


Furthermore, not only will you have to weather the negative reactions of others, you will have to face down any self-doubts, feelings of unfaithfulness and guilt that may try to follow you.


No one said that leaving is easy. It will cost you your life.

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Timothy Carigon
Timothy Carigon
May 27, 2023

WOW, After 30 years in the pastorate and about 6 years of walking away this is exactly how I feel, it's right on, and it encourages me to know I am not the only one. Everything on this website has challenged me, confirmed in me, and helps me continue forward, no matter what!

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T Aagard
T Aagard
May 29, 2023
Replying to

You are now "running the raced marked out for you with perseverance, fixing your eyes on Jesus". There is more transformation ahead. There may be more "hindrance" or "sin" to "throw off". That is my experience and I don't expect anyone's to differ from these instructions. Heb. 12:1-4. It's easier to get out of the institution than for the institution to get out of you. The trap clings close.


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raelynnmerritt2
May 23, 2023

Third paragraph from the bottom. Second sentence, 16th word "bread" ? Did you mean "break" ?


Love the insights. Well said and wrItten.


Reminds me of Paul Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress. Been doing that since I left home @ age 17.....


Have a word fed and Spirit led life 😇

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Andrew Damiani
Andrew Damiani
Jan 03, 2022

I hear your heart in this teachings, but where does that led me? God has a set pattern in His word, they are not up for debate or human notions, there are 5 fold ministry anointing given to God's called men in the church to preach and teach the word of God under an anointing so the people can be built up by the word of God, its the believer job to respond to the word of God in taking it to heart in their daily choices, the Pastor is not a nanny by as Paul put it "Preach the Word", instruct them in righteousness in sound doctrine. I very concerned what you are doing here in leading people away…

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T Aagard
T Aagard
Jan 04, 2022
Replying to

You can't talk the word of God. You can only give traditions of men. I responded to the scripture you gave. You ignored the scripture I gave. 1. Where is the "call" to be elders? 1 Tim. 3:1 - "ANYONE who aspires to the work..."

2. God "gave some" as pastors and teachers, but EVERYONE is to teach. Col. 3:16. EVERYONE is to shepherd - oversight. Heb. 12:15. EVERYONE is to "imitate" the Chief Shepherd." 1 Cor. 11:1. The those gifted equip the rest to do that work. A gift is not a permission slip to HOG that work as clergyism does. God's people don't mind being EXCLUDED from the work. They don't mind consuming 84% of their giving t…


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Toni Booth
Toni Booth
Nov 18, 2021

So true! Every word of this. But worth it when it's the Lord leading you and your heart and hands are pure

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T Aagard
T Aagard
Oct 12, 2021

Twenty five years ago my wife, two boys and I left pulpit and pew church. We had been falsely accused. We were eager to practice what God's word said. God began to teach us more and more. My first lesson was meeting a brother in the park across the street from my home with severe cerebral palsy. That began a profound lesson from God on "washing one another's feet", but not feet. It would be daily, for more than a year. More and more scripture came into the light exposing more and more of the errors of clergyism. Then my wifed died of Leukemia and our vibrant home fellowship was dispersed by God when they would not split into t…

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